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Speaking of texting, if you don't do it, you might want to learn ... Especially if you are returning to the dating scene after a long haitus. Or at least be very aware of what you share online - especially in the social media arena. no more waiting "three days" after a date to contact your new love interest. If you had an amazing first date, text them the next day and let them know...Besides, aren’t things so much better when they fall into place naturally? Perhaps for some people that’s their reality, but, for most of us it’s not.For most of us life is a series of ups and downs and perpetual chaos. I learned to go with the flow, especially when I meet someone new.There is one thing that can stand in between you and your dating goals and that’s your dating expectations. I focused too much on what I wanted and what I was looking for that I forget to enjoy the process. Some people just want to enjoy someone’s company, some just want sex, some want a companion, while others are looking for a life partner, or marriage. Well, we like to be in control of our lives and our situations. We all have an idea about how our lives should be and how things should turn out and when they don’t we can’t really handle it and stress ourselves out trying to get it where we want when in reality we are forcing something that just isn’t meant to be. How many times do you try and manipulate a situation to get a someone to like you or want to be with you? You’ve tried playing hard to get, you’ve tried giving them everything they said they want, but really where did that get you? You should never have to force it, it should just BE.Dating can be one of two things, dating can suck or dating can be a fun way of self-exploration. Yes, I agree completely that there a lot of ass hats out there. That’s why I always remind everyone that focusing on the process NOT the dating outcomes is where you need to be to manage dating expectations. Whatever you are looking for, managing your dating expectations will help you get there. Well, if you’re expecting a big love story overnight, then think again. Love that’s developed over time means so much more. Show of hands, how many times have you refused to let go of a hopeless dating situation just because you just KNOW it’s meant to be? It got you nowhere fast because in reality, if someone wants to be with you they will be with you because you’re both naturally on the same page. While it’s important to be clear about your intentions and expectations, you also need to manage your dating expectations by being realistic in order to get where you want to be.I can’t MAKE someone fall in love with me, nor can I manipulate the situation to work in my favor.I have to just be myself and if they want to board Suzie’s Magic Fun Bus then they are more than welcome! I don’t play games, I don’t tell men what they want to hear in order to get them to like me. I learned the hard way that those “tactics” never work in my favor. But, it certainly took me a while to get to this place.
"Sex changes everything," says relationship coach and matchmaker Melissa Darnay.television series -- spawned not only a book, but a dating revolution that, for a while, turned many singles' lives upside down.At the core of the shake up: A philosophy that told us if your partner isn't giving you the attention you expect, don't hang around and wait for change - just move on.To me, attraction and a connection with the other person is key, as well as ambition. Also, I think of a new prospect like a puzzle piece, I ask myself if they really truly fit into my life’s puzzle or if I would have to force it. Things always fall in place where they’re supposed to. After my divorce, I learned that I can’t control everything that happens to me.I love seeing someone excited about what they are doing, to have goals and to achieve them. Regardless of how hot they are or how successful or how they make me feel, I need to make sure they are the right person for me and that takes time. That, my friends, is how I manage MY dating expectations. Although I have an idea of where I want to be, I can’t plan out my life and expect it all to fall into place in a nice neat package.
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So how do you keep yourself from expecting too much too soon?